Your ex dominates your thoughts day in and day out. As much as
you try to think of something else, or even to move on, they just can't
get out of your head. The hurt, pain, and feelings of bitterness and
loneliness don't seem to be going away either. Finally, after having
enough of dealing with these thoughts and thinking of your lost love you
decided that you want them back in your life. You are going to get your
ex back!
Maybe
you tried tactics already and came up short. Whatever has happened
before you need to keep your chin up and see that it is not too late.
You can get your ex back with these secret strategies. Read carefully
and apply them to your life as the time comes.
Start
first simply by being more positive, but it goes deeper than that. The
world will not become a happier place until you are happy. Those
feelings you've dealing with since the break up need to be dealt with as
well. It is probably not universally suggested to do this but feel
those feelings fully. Find any doubts or things about these
emotions that feels out of alignment with who you are, and change them.
That is the very first step to this process. You will be much more
equipped to clear your head and think clearly if you do this before the
next step, which is often the first step by other sources you will read.
So handle within before we get to the relationship.
You
are now ready to answer a very important question. What caused the
relationship to end? Most of the time the answer to this question can be
solved by simply thinking hard about the relationship and replaying it
over and over in your head to see where the core problems are. If you
are unable to come up with a reason or don't know it it's fine to ask
your ex why they broke up with you. you need to tell them that you need
to know this so that you can grow and change from it so it won't happen again.
That is the whole idea of this step. You need to fix the root cause of
the relationship so that the next time you won't break up for the same
reason. Why is this important? Well, unless you enjoy reading these
articles or plan to in a few months from now, then you need to fix this
problem at the source. Find it. Fix it.
Keep
contact with your ex limited to nonexistent if you can. Anywhere
between one month to six weeks is ideal. Your ex is probably feeling
similar things that you are, bitterness, pain, and hurt, so they also
need time to cope with it. This time is for you to mentally cool down.
Let some time pass. Whatever it was that seemed so important that caused
the break up, and likely a fight, will suddenly not seem to matter as
much once a suitable amount of time has passed. When you reach this time
frame it will be a lot easier to work out that issue because you will
both be calmer and have had time to think about it. Always keep the door
open for communication even if you are not speaking with your ex.
You're going to need that line very soon.
Not
only just to think of other things but to do other things. You need to
reconnect with who you are again. Do something you've never done, take a
trip somewhere, learn a new skill, whatever you do just get out of the
house. Relationships can end because one of the partners thought the
other was becoming too predictable, boring, and no longer challenging.
Right now, right here, this is your chance to become interesting again.
Use this opportunity to meet new people, find new hobbies, and have new
experiences without your ex. This will create new conversations between
you and restore the exciting person they fell in love with back in their
lives. Your ind will thank you also, since it will not have to think
about your ex all day long and can be free to enjoy life. This month
apart is a very important time to grow and come back refreshed and a new
person for your ex.
If
you have been following these steps to this point you are now very much a
different person than you were at the beginning. Have you changed
enough to get back your ex? You're about to find out and that comes with
contacting them for the first time since the break up. You want this to
be personal so no texting. While getting your ex back through texting
is a fine and perfect method if that works for you then feel free to do
it, but you want this to be personal. Texting is simply not a personal
way of contact. So this is how it's going to work and pay attention
since it can be delicate.
The first call is basically checking in
on your ex. It doesn't have to be long or deep in conversation and it
shouldn't be. You need to find out where you stand, where they stand,
and you have to know if that uncomfortable awkward feeling has a chance
to finally leave forever. This conversation shouldn't last longer than
15 minutes and even that is probably too long. Any and all talk of the
relationship should not be talked about. It will feel weird, it will be
awkward, and it may not be easy, but if you want your ex back you've got
to talk to them at some point and now is that time. Be polite and
brief. You're just checking in and testing the waters. If that goes
well, breathe a huge breath of relief and get mentally prepared for the
next time. After you have done this a few times and are making progress
we move onto the next step.
Either you or your ex will propose to
meet in person. This needs to be handled as if it was that awkward and
weird first call to your ex. Face-to-face is not the same as a phone
call and if you don't know that now you will once you see them. The
topics are much broader during this meeting but talk of the relationship
should either be avoided or delicately handled if it comes up. In
person you will really know if those uncomfortable feelings between the
two of you are truly gone. You are almost home free, but not quite
there. The good news is you have no restored contact and communication
with your ex to the point where real progress can begin.